The Last Piece of Cake

Themes: Comedy, Contemporary, Power, Reality, Rejection
Length: 1 Minute
Gender: Female

The character, a woman in her late 50s to 60s, stands in her kitchen, gesturing dramatically as she recounts the absurd battle for the last piece of cake, switching between exasperation and humor.

I swear, it’s like they all conspired against me. Last piece of cake, just sitting there, like a trophy in the fridge. And I’m thinking, ‘Finally, a win for me!’ But oh no, suddenly everyone’s on a diet until that one little slice of heaven shows up. Sandra’s doing keto, Mike’s on intermittent fasting, and Laura, oh Laura’s ‘gluten-free’—whatever that means this week. But when it’s down to the last piece? Suddenly they’re all circling like vultures. So there I am, staking my claim, fork in hand, when Mike, the jerk, swoops in with that smug grin of his and says, ‘Oh, were you gonna eat that?’ Well, Mike, yes, that was the plan. But now we’re in this standoff, like it’s the O.K. Corral and the prize isn’t gold, it’s chocolate ganache. And do you know what he does? He takes it. Just like that! Doesn’t even blink. And I’m left holding my sad, empty fork, looking like an idiot. And that’s not even the worst part. The worst part is the smug little look he gives, like he’s just conquered the world. Over a piece of cake! Like, who are we kidding? We’re grown adults fighting over cake. But it’s not about the cake, is it? It’s about power, control—who gets the last laugh. And let me tell you, Mike? Mike always gets the last laugh.